The holidays are often described as the most wonderful time of the year—a season filled with family, traditions, and celebration. But for anyone grieving the loss of a loved one, this time of year can be overwhelming, emotional, and even painful. On a recent episode of Health Matters with the Medicine Center Pharmacy, Chaplain Joseph Kampert from Aultman Health System joined us to discuss how individuals and families can understand, honor, and navigate grief—especially during the holiday season.
In this blog, we break down the key insights shared during the conversation, along with practical tools you can use to support yourself or someone you love.
Understanding What “Normal” Grief Looks Like
Grief is a deeply personal experience—there is no handbook, no timetable, and no “right way” to feel. According to Chaplain Kampert, typical grief can show up emotionally, mentally, physically, or spiritually. You may experience:
Waves of sadness or numbness
Trouble concentrating
Fatigue or changes in sleep
Questions about meaning or faith
Moments of joy that feel surprising or uncomfortable
Nothing about grief is linear. It comes and goes—and that’s normal.
Watch a replay of the Live Stream YouTube Live Stream Replay
How the Holidays Intensify Grief
Chaplain Kampert emphasized that the holidays often amplify grief because of:
Traditions tied to the person who is gone
Expectations for joy and togetherness
Memories that surface through music, rituals, and gatherings
Social pressure to “be okay”
You may find yourself dreading events you once looked forward to. And that’s okay. Awareness is the first step toward healing.
The Grievers’ Holiday Bill of Rights
One of the most meaningful tools Chaplain Kampert shared is the Grievers’ Holiday Bill of Rights—a reminder that you are allowed to protect your well-being during the season. A few examples include:
You have the right to feel whatever you feel—sadness, joy, anger, or all of them at once.
You have the right to change traditions or skip activities that don’t feel manageable.
You have the right to say no without guilt.
You have the right to honor your loved one in your own way.
These rights help create emotional space to heal rather than forcing yourself into environments or expectations that feel overwhelming.
Planning Ahead: Practical Strategies
Grief becomes especially difficult when the holidays “sneak up.” Chaplain Kampert offered several strategies to prepare mentally and emotionally:
1. Create a “So What?” List
This tool helps you quickly release overwhelming thoughts by asking, “If this doesn’t go perfectly… so what?”
It brings perspective when emotions feel heavy.
2. Set Healthy Boundaries
You can protect your emotional energy by choosing which events, conversations, or traditions you engage in. Boundaries may sound like:
“I can only stay for a short time.”
“I’m choosing a quiet holiday this year.”
“I’m skipping this event, but thank you for understanding.”
3. Focus on What You Can Control
You may not control grief triggers or how others behave—but you can control your pace, your environment, and how you care for yourself.
4. Make Space to Honor Your Loved One
This might include:
Lighting a candle
Sharing stories
Making their favorite dish
Leaving an open seat at the table
Doing an act of kindness in their memory
Rituals create connection and can soften the ache of absence.
Helping Grieving Children Through the Holidays
Children grieve differently than adults—often in “bursts.” Chaplain Kampert shared that caregivers can help by:
Keeping communication open
Answering questions honestly
Allowing them to participate in rituals
Maintaining routine where possible
Giving reassurance and affection
Children feel grief in more ways than they can verbalize, so patience and presence matter.
Is It OK to Celebrate the Holidays?
Yes—absolutely.
One of the most beautiful insights from the interview was this:
Joy does not dishonor your loved one.
Feeling moments of happiness does not mean you love or miss them any less. Grief and joy can coexist.
Starting New Traditions
If old traditions feel too painful, starting new ones can offer comfort and a sense of direction. New traditions might include:
Hosting at a different location
Volunteering
Traveling
Creating a new holiday ritual
Celebrating on a different day
New traditions don’t replace your loved one—they simply create space for healing.
When You Feel Stuck
Grief can create periods of deep sadness, numbness, or inertia. Chaplain Kampert encourages reaching out—to a counselor, pastor, trusted friend, or support group. Aultman Grief Services offers free resources, support groups, and guidance for anyone grieving, regardless of where they received medical care.
Supporting a Loved One Who Is Grieving
If someone you love is hurting this holiday season, consider:
Asking how you can support them
Listening without trying to “fix” their grief
Offering help with tasks or invitations without pressure
Acknowledging their loss
Being present in whatever way they need
Sometimes the most powerful words are:
“I’m here. You’re not alone.”
A Message From Medicine Center Pharmacy
At Medicine Center Pharmacy and MedShopRx.com, we care about the full health of our community—mind, body, and spirit. The holidays can be joyful and heavy at the same time, and we hope these insights from Chaplain Kampert offer comfort, clarity, and encouragement.
If you or someone you love is struggling this season, we encourage you to reach out to Aultman Grief Services or a trusted mental health provider. Healing isn’t linear, but you don’t have to walk through it alone.
Thanks for listening today! We’d like to remind our listeners, if you suspect you have a medical issue, please contact your healthcare provider. Thanks to our sponsor Aultman Health System. As always, we thank our listeners for joining us on Health Matters with the Medicine Center Pharmacy. Have a healthy week and we’ll see you again next Friday right here on News Talk 1480 WHBC.
